YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize