That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
