so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
