girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
