Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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