Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
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