I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Randomize
