The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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