what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
do herpes really smell.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
