Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
North Korea, Best Korea!
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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