We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
