Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Randomize