sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
