I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
You ruined the universe
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize