genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
