Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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