is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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