We're facebook friends in real life
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
