PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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