I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
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