This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Terrible idea I love it
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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