lets start a swedish sibling band together
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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