this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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