Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize