More tranny stories later!
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
