How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Randomize
