it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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