coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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