i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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