There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Randomize
