I am puke
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Randomize
