I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Can I color on your dick again?
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
