I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
