This girl is more easily done than said...
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
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