i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Randomize
