his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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