Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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