I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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