Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize