problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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