I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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