Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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