11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
