I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Randomize
