so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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