Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
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