Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
