I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize
