it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize
