Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I touched a dick in church today
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
