garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
If I die, sorry about rent.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
